that sucker.
and then he really went-
well;before that,
he came and said goodbyes;
but didnt look into my eyes.

jus said:"hey,im going".
i was dumbfounded and speechless.
looked at him as if he was saying the truth.
he smiled and avoided contact.
feeling like a window plane-tansparent.

please;dont go.
i pretended it didnt matter.
he walked out of the room without looking back.
what can i do to make u stay?
i silently watched his shadow shrink out of the room.

i stood up and ran;
i tugged at his shirt and wanted to say:
when will you be coming back?
i didnt dare.
he still didnt look at me.

WE sent him downstairs.
i wished the taxi to be late.
'the taxi is here,' he said.
i felt my shoulders drop.
i silently paced behind the rest.

i watched his back.
already missing him.
i couldnt believe it.
how can you leave without remembering my birthday?
he didnt wish me sweet fifteen.

they loaded his luggage into the vehicle.
we hugged him- me only slighty.
i want to cry.
why must this be goodbye?
your week here has gone in a blink;
and i didnt even see u twice in one week.

the vehicle started and got ready to move;
i felt my eye heating and tears fogging my sight.
i turned away,didnt want anybody to see.
you sucker;how can you do this to me.
i went to one side and acted i was all right.

the sound of the engine roared and interrupted my thoughts.
i quickly looked up but the car was already out.
the screeching of wheels;mocking me i was too late,
i havent tell him, what i had desired then.
the taxi drove away,becoming just a tiny dot in the horizon.

i stood there motionless;
like a million years have passed,
i couldnt tear my eyes away from the roads.
no,he'll come back;even if we're just going to be only friends.
this is goodnight; and not goodbye.

i will get what i desire someday.
i want someone,to never to let go of my hand.

i turned and followed them to the lift.

grACER