i decided i will not run anymore.

what done has been done & although i really regretted it,
i need to accept reality & move on,
no matter how much it hurts.



i just happened to see his post.
i pray that he'll never remove his blog or change his URL.
i realize how much i still care about him
& that i still so very much want to know how he's coping.

i can never rest until he moves on fully,
away from me.

life's too short to be unhappy,
said i.
then i'll just pretend to be happy,
said he.

he said he stopped believing.
he said he might never be able to love a girl as much again;
& it's my fault for screwing it up for the next girl who'll walk into his life.

i loved you so much.
why are you doing this to yourself?
please, don't do this to yourself.
you deserve so much, so much more.
why can't you see it?

you're a huge chapter in my life,
& so am i in yours.
please; i'm on my knees.
i beg of you;
continue your story;
believe, have faith & let go.

you deserve so much more.

i cried again.

xox;♥ace