i miss my secondary school friends.
gabby, grace, michelle. sometimes, avina, carrie.

what happened to all of us?

i miss the cheerful, blissful days where we give each other hugs when we greet each other in the morning, walk to our respective classes and settle down for the anthem.

even though i was the only one from a different class, i often or always wave to you guys or give a wink whenever i walk past your class. and when we have class together, chinese and literature, we always sit together without fail.

we pass notes to each other under the table, draw on each other's notes and textbooks and give messages to pass the time. we giggle and study together. we talk about boys, school, our problems, our future, everything.

we're branded. we were known to be the artsy fartsy gang. we're close knitted. we loved each other for who we are, no matter the differences in skill or experience.

recess was our joy, we rush to queue, and buy food for each other when we're down late. then we always have a private corner in the foyer to eat our grub. our view oversee the school field and the canteen; the other girls eating too, bickering, gossiping, chit-chatting over the short half an hour break before the school bell rings.

we can talk about anything in the world. we were so innocent then. school ends and we meet at each other's classes; depending on which teachers release us first. we will walk together, to the bus stop. sometimes, we wait for our parents to pick us up or say see you when we have to leave for our co-curriculum.

we will always hug when we say goodbye, 'see you tomorrow'- with a smile, believing that our friendship will never end. we were each other's priority. at least, for me. i've never been so glad to share this bond with my girl-friends. we learn together, grow together.

it never did end. but what happened to us now?

ariel, rachel, andrea, payal.

i have a different group of friends. i was part of yours too. you guys are the smart-asses. but i was the only arty one. but i was also taken in, accepted as part of you guys.

i sat with ariel and rachel for the most part, and andrea with payal. we called ourselves the back-row-trio. i wasn't stupid, but i was last in the top class, struggling with ariel. but i had fun.

i was always in awe with rachel's brains. a true hard-working and intelligent lady. studies first, boys- ugh. literally. the mature one, who chides me with my nonsense with st patrick boys. ariel, my buddy for disturbing rachel, and always asking for explanation for schoolwork. especially chemistry and mathematics. i still remembered that time when we tried pulling your arm-hair using squash-tape. it was hilarious. rachel's ones managed to be pulled out. but mine didn't.

i felt like a loser for being the last in class. but i still felt belonged with you guys- i was grateful and loved how you guys leave me messages or encouragement or random notes in my journal. i was always the one distracted in class; and always disturb you guys. but you gladly joined in; and still manage to do well in school.

payal, i wasn't close to you, but i like having you around too. you make the funniest racist jokes- since you were the only one who is not chinese. i was close to andrea initially; we had the same co-curriculum inside and outside school. floorball and judo brought us together. we talk about guys too, and many of your secret crushes which are not so secret after awhile. its funny how we used to like the same guy and you tried to back down for me. but i was so dense before- he liked you way before. i only saw what you did for me and i'm sorry it didn;t work out between you two. but i enjoyed seeing you brave and courageous to confess to every guy you liked. and when things don't get going, you'll tell me.

we fivesome are still tight. we do meet up often. but it's saddening to see us keep changing our meeting days and it only seem to me that ariel and i making the effort to clear our plans to suit your timings. we do understand all of us have activities, priorities, family and things going on with our lives. but what place does your old friends have in your heart?

we did learn and grow up together- 2 years at least, some of us, 4 years, some 6, some ten. and as of 2013, we have known each other for 14 years. i find you guys a significant part of my life. do you as well? don't take us for granted. at least, do settle on the date, stick to it, and don't be 2 hours late.

i hope we can still go on strong.

girls, i miss you, let's all gather, and bitch together one day; when we all settle down. how does that sound?